I am black and blue, and not just on the inside.
I have come to the conclusion that I will never be right or justified.
I am still trying to figure out my role in all of this, my mistake, my mess and I don't know. Is it admitting defeat to say that I am too demanding when I know I am not? To say I am wrong when I know I am not? To take responsibility for something I cannot own? Just for the peace? Just to move onward? Because I know resistence is futile? Insistence is futile? If we trace it back far enough who committed the greater sin? Who had the most at stake? And who fucking cares anyway?
I am here moving through the house, picking up this and that, the questions on an endless loop in my head. I know that there are no answers, only days and nights from here until there wherever "there" is. And I do not know how to make the next move, what it should be. The stones in my heart slow me down.
I am the woman who walked into doors.
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2 comments:
i'm sorry.
try opening those doors...just to see what's on the other side.
just to look. for yourself.
Did you read that book? It was a good one. The woman who walked into doors.
Sounds life sucks right now for you. Sorry and sending a hug.
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